In a 2021 issue of The New Yorker is a review of documentary about an Author. I haven’t seen the documentary so I can’t comment about the review or the documentary. The article, however, quotes a passage from the Author’s writing: (and I quote):
“Liz liked Jim very much. She liked it the way he walked from the shop and often went the kitchen door to watch for him to start down the road. She liked it about his mustache. She liked it about how white his teeth when he smiled. One day she liked it the way the hair on his arms was black and how white they were above the tanned line when he washed up in the washbasin outside the house. Liking that made her feel funny.”
“It it it it it?”
Wouldn’t the sentences be more streamlined (and more grammatically correct) without the repetition of “it”? “She liked the way he walked,” for example? “She liked his mustache.” “She liked how white his teeth were when he smiled.” “She liked the way the hair,” and so on.
And what is “funny?” Amused, irritated, aroused, amorous? Perhaps the Author meant that Liz wasn’t sure how she felt. Why not say that? “Funny” is too vague and generalized for this reader.
If I were a fiction editor considering this prose, I would say, “Reject. Next.”
If you can guess the Author, please enter your speculation in the Comments.
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Yes, he is the Great Ernest Hemingway. Apparently he was more of a Big Personality than a Great Writer. I read most of his novels and stories in high school. I thought he was misogynist and sexist (not the same thing) and cold.
Hemingway fans, please don’t attack me for criticizing Hemingway. That’s my opinion.
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